Ask the Rabbi: Beracha when Lighting for a Neighbor

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Question: A neighbor who is out of the house a lot sometimes asks me to light Chanuka candles on his behalf. Is that okay? When I light for him, should I make a beracha?

Answer: Your friend can fulfill his basic mitzva in this way (Mishna Berura 676:9). If your neighbor comes home very late, it is a good question whether it is better for him to light himself then or have you do it for him at a "better" time (see Living the Halachic Process VI, D-7). We will leave that decision to him and his rabbis.
In general, "Reuven" recites a beracha before doing a mitzva on behalf of "Shimon" (Rambam, Berachot 11:13, mentioning the mitzvot of mezuza, hafrashat ma’asrot, ma’akeh, and mila). This is because birchot hamitzvot relate to the mitzva’s action, not its fulfillment (Minchat Shlomo II:58). However, the way Reuven and Shimon team up in the fulfillment of the mitzva can differ significantly from mitzva to mitzva. We will give some examples.
All valid mohalim are halachically capable of doing mila to Shimon’s son, with Shimon just being the one with a specific obligation to do so. If Reuven does the mila, he fulfills the mitzva for himself, irrespective of whether Shimon asked him or fulfills his mitzva (see Shach, Choshen Mishpat 382:4). In contrast, Reuven needs Shimon’s authorization to take off ma’asrot and the mitzva’s impact applies to Shimon. In both cases, Reuven makes the beracha (Rambam ibid.; Derech Emuna, Terumot 4:1). Therefore, we would expect that if Reuven lights Chanuka candles in Shimon’s house, he would make the beracha.
The complication begins with the Bach, cited by the Magen Avraham (676:4) and Mishna Berura (675:9). He seems to say that one who already lit Chanuka lights can light for a woman (his case) but can make the beracha only if she is listening, because it is "the responsibility of a person’s body." If Shimon listens, it is as if he makes the beracha himself. Rav SZ Auerbach, while puzzled why Chanuka lights are different from other mitzvot, explains that since the mitzva devolves on Shimon’s house, which does not relate to Reuven, Reuven cannot make the beracha for himself.

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There are other understandings of the Magen Avraham (Mikraei Kodesh (Frank) Chanuka 23; Igrot Moshe (OC I, 190) and Chovat Hadar 1:(42) generally concur). They say that the first beracha, i.e., a standard birkat hamitzva, can be made even if the home’s resident is not there. The need for Shimon’s presence concerns only the berachot of She’asa Nissim and Shehecheyanu (on the first night). This is because these berachot are connected to the experience of seeing the publicizing of the miracle, and they can only be made by or in the presence of the one to whom the mitzva applies. (If Reuven will not have an opportunity to make these berachot in his home, it is a different story.)
A precedent for these berachot being separate from the mitzva of lighting per se is found in the Shulchan Aruch (OC 676:2) – if someone has not lit or is connected to a lighting, he should make She’asa Nissim and Shehecheyanu when he sees someone else’s candles. What is the subject of considerable debate is whether when members of one’s household light on his behalf, he needs to make She’asa Nissim and Shehecheyanu himself (see Mishna Berura 676:6; ibid. 677:14).
Let us move on to practical suggestions. The indications are strong enough that you should definitely not recite She’asa Nissim and Shehecheyanu at your neighbor’s house, and therefore, he should try to find Chanuka lights upon which to recite them. Regarding Lehadlik Ner, it is very difficult to decide whether you can recite it. Therefore, it is usually best to light at your neighbor’s home right after lighting at your own home, in which case the beracha goes on both venues (Acharonim, including Dirshu 675:15, in the name of Rav Elyashiv). An exception would be when your neighbor is abroad, in Central or Western Europe, in which case, you should light at a time when it is night where he is (see Living the Halachic Process VI, D-8). In that case, it is safer not to make any of the berachot.

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