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- Kohanim
Answer: The Torah (Vayikra 21:8) writes about a kohen "v’kidashto" (you shall sanctify him), from which Chazal learn to treat a kohen as an honored person (Gittin 59b). Examples include giving a kohen the first aliya or first choice of food being served. The Yerushalmi (Berachot 8:5) writes: "One who uses a kohen is like one who misappropriates objects in the Beit Hamikdash." Having a kohen serve another in various ways seems to contradict his elevated status. While here there is only a positive commandment to honor, this is reminiscent of the mitzva of respect for parents (see Kiddushin 31b), which has a positive element of kavod and an avoidance of disrespect (mora).
There are indications that sometimes a kohen may "serve" others. The Hagahot Mordechai (Gittin, 461) tells a story of a kohen pouring water on Rabbeinu Tam’s hands (a classic act of reverence/subservience – see Melachim II, 3:11). Upon being questioned, Rabbeinu Tam explained that kohanim nowadays lack the kedusha they had when they served in the Beit Hamikdash (see Zevachim 17b). It is left unanswered how he reconciled the clear fact that the halachot of a kohen still apply. Rabbeinu Peter (ibid.) answered that it was permitted because the kohen was mochel (relinquished his rights to) his kavod. Another proof of leeway is the gemara (Kiddushin 21b) that assumes a kohen can be an eved ivri (the Semag, Aseh 83, explains that the kohen is not restricted when he acts with a financial incentive).
Bemare Habazak - Rabbis Questions (654)
Rabbi Daniel Mann
427 - Tefillin Prepared by Children under Bar Mitzva
428 - A Kohen Serving Others
429 - The Necessity to See the Moon Before Kiddush Levana
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Another factor that could have impacted the Rabbeinu Tam story is that since it is also a mitzva for someone to honor his rebbe (Avot 4:12) or a great rabbi who is revered by all, it is appropriate for the kohen to serve him (see Yabia Omer, VI, Orach Chayim 22). Similarly, the Taz (ibid.) says that it must have been "enjoyable" for the kohen to wash Rabbeinu Tam’s hands, in which case, no mechila was needed.
The Rama (OC 128:45) forbids "using" a kohen even in our days, but says that mechila solves the issue. The Mishna Berura (128:175) does cite the opinion that mechila does not help and concludes that it is good to be machmir if one can and that one certainly should not use a kohen for disgraceful matters.
Let us look at your situation. It is healthy for you to prefer normal treatment other than privileges regarding aliyot, zimun, etc. The fact that your mechila is sincere and complete bodes well for others. On the other hand, those who want to "spare you" are supported by some sources. Additionally, even when mechila works, if one gives the honor anyway, he receives a mitzva (compare to Ketubot 67b). While even if you prevail, he gets credit for trying to honor you (see Kiddushin 40a), he might get more if you refrained from serving him.
Many of us grew up with the good societal norm that all people are created equal. That is not precise in Judaism. Like it or not (Korach did not, but we should), Hashem selected kohanim to be special, and it is correct for us to give this expression. If I were a kohen, I would also be embarrassed if I were treated too specially and would be wary of negative reaction. However, when someone sincerely wants to respect your beloved "tribe" (likely, more than you, personally) it is positive to try to accommodate him in moderation.
Bemare Habazak - Rabbis Questions Ask the Rabbi: Having a Non-Jew Build a Sukka and Assemble Arba’a Minim
Kuzari -Rabbi Ari Shvat Kuzari class 8- "Answering Questions on the Kuzari's Proof from Mass Revelation
Rabbis in Midrash
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Kuzari -Rabbi Ari Shvat Kuzari class 9 - "Seeing is Believing" (parag. 21-30)
These paragraphs elaborate on the theme that seeing and knowing is better than any attempt to prove logically, and begins explaining the difference between Israel and gentiles.
Ein Aya Various Universal Stages of the Geula Process
Rav Kook examines the various stages of redemption, explaining how (in addition to the obvious oft-mentioned stages of ingathering the exiles, reviving the Hebrew language, army, state etc.) the messianic dream of world prosperity, the State of Israel and world unity can and are realistically and logically gradually coming true.
Kuzari -Rabbi Ari Shvat Kuzari class 8- "Answering Questions on the Kuzari's Proof from Mass Revelation
How do we know that the "claim" of mass revelation to 2,000,000 witnesses at Mt. Sinai is really true? This important class answers all of the questions skeptics ask about this claim of the Kuzari.
Ein Aya Armies Still Necessary for Balance & the War Against Wars
Rav Kook explains why the world was originally divided into the various seemingly contradicting ideologies and cultures, in order to develop each one respectively. Swords or armies symbolize how each respective ideology defends themselves, as well as deters their opposing ideologies and cultures. On the other hand, the messianic era will be one of peace, and Rav Kook explains the transition to that stage, which mankind is already undergoing.
The Land of Israel LGBT'S IN ISRAEL
The question was asked, how can one make Aliyah with the LGBT parades?
Kuzari -Rabbi Ari Shvat Kuzari class 7 - Five Accumulative Proofs of G-d
As a preparation for the Kuzari's classic proof of G-d from the mass-revelation at Sinai, we start here with 5 other directions to strengthen our belief which also contribute to what the Kuzari will present as well.
Ein Aya Muscle & Meaning: The Dual Nature of Gevurah (Physical Strength)
Is physical strength and fitness a necessity or an ideal? Although it if often totally overlooked among topics of Judaism, Rav Kook writes that it clearly is also a necessity to deter the many enemies of Israel, but even in Y'mot HaMashiach, in the Messianic era, to a certain extent, it's ideal continues even after our enemies will have been finished off.
