“Do Not Disregard the Practices of One’s Mother” | Rabbi Yossef Carmel | Beit Midrash

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The midrash (Bamidbar Rabba 11:5) learns the following from the first beracha of Birkat Kohanim (Bamidbar 6:24): "’He will bless you’ – with sons; ‘and He will guard you’ – with daughters." Although blessing usually finds expression in the addition of positive elements, still one should realize the importance of just holding on to what he already acquired. If one knows how to acquire riches but does not know how to protect them, he did not benefit from acquiring in the first place, except for exercising his ability to toil.

It is traditionally accepted (ed. note – with noticeable change since this was written 80 years ago) that a woman’s nature is not to create new phenomena. She is not in contact with the new. All of her honor is inward (see Tehillim 45:14). However, she watches with great care and great insistence that which she is given – more than a man does. In many homes, the "fragrance of Judaism" has waned, but the women have still preserved it in their kitchens. That is where the woman is in charge, and that is where she prevents changes from occurring.

The gemara does tell a story of criticism of a woman. She was married to a holy man, and she would fasten his tefillin to his arm. When he died, she married a tax collector, and then she would fasten the seals of a tax collector (a frowned upon profession) onto his arm (Avoda Zara 39a). That is because her level of righteousness depends on the environs she finds herself in, which sets its imprint upon her. However, once the "imprint" is set, it remains forever.

This watchfulness is especially important in our times and in our [type of] community. We (Rav Yisraeli was the founding rabbi of the Kfar Haroeh, an important religious moshav) are involved in new forms of living, or actually in the renewal of a type of life that we lost and forgot as time went on. That which is new is attractive to the heart and exciting. It is a great danger that the new will be built to a great extent on the foundation of belittling the old, without remembering that the new has a leg to stand, a future, and value only to the extent that it is based on the old.

It is important for us to stress repeatedly the side of conservatism, which includes being careful and exacting about all accepted practices. I refer not just to being careful over halachic matters but even to be careful about matters connected to the customs of the Jewish People. Even those things that are called "yikhat em" (see Mishlei 30:17), things that our mothers were careful about, are valued like laws of the Torah themselves.

There are times when people are fooled into wanting to do an action that has great prominence from an external perspective, thinking it is better than that done in a more private manner. However, the outcome is of little-to-no value, and the impression it leaves dissipates quickly and disappears as if it never existed.

Chazal proclaimed: "We only try to strengthen those who are strong" (Psikta, Naso). Only those who are in tune with the idea of strengthening will benefit from the exhortations. For them, that which is done will not be lost but will give fruit.

Parashat Hashavua

Naso