In the central Beith Ha Keneset of my city, on Yom HaShoa, there is the habit that each of the six candles (that commemorate the six milion of Jews killed in the camps) is lighted by a survivor accompanied by a boy or a girl. Is it possible for a ’over bar/bat mizvah’ to give the help the survivor, giving him/her the hand in front of many people? Is there any problem of Tzniut or Marit Ain?
It would be preferable for boys to assist the male survivors and girls to assist the women. If the rabbi of the community sanctions the present practice he can be asked quietly and respectfully if there is a compelling reason not to change, but there is no need for a public protest.