- Family and Society
- Conversion
Conversion for the wrong reason
Question
I’m not a Jew, but I fell in love with a Jewish woman. I was willing to convert only to marry her, until I realized that this was wrong and unworthy. Conversion should be born out of believe and love for g-d, and not love for a woman. It made me start to think and revaluate many believes and values in my life. I started reading the torah and began to change my life based on the mitzvos and I started to learn Hebrew.
I have realized that a bond with g-d will test me and will change the life that I had lived; it is a burden to carry. Suddenly I felt a spiritual connection, which I had missed all my life. For the first time I feel loved by g-d and this long process, that started with a false believe is constantly changing towards a true and honest believe in g-d.
Now to come to my question, I have already entered a bond with g-d and I’m willing to live by his rules and to show him my sincere intention and true believe I have taken the very painful step of circumcision, but will I be able to enter the official Jewish community by conversion, although my initial intention was born out of unworthy reasons?
Answer
The proper motivation for conversion must be present at the time of the conversion. Many people develop ideas or relationships for what are originally bad reasons, but improve themselves. The original attraction to Judaism is not the one that matters.

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Rabbi Chaim Tabasky
Rabbi Chaim Tabasky teaches a shiur in gemarah at the Beit Midrash program of the Machon Hagavoah l'Torah at Bar Ilan University. He is also a certified examiner of STa"M (Sifrei Torah, Tefillin and Mezuzot) and a narrative therapist.

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