I’ve been studying many esoteric sciences lately and can’t help but be confused by the dichotomy of the cabalistic writings done by abraham the jew (sacred magic of abramelin) and his philisophical beliefs. supposedly the people who studied this would meditate on the Law. My question is: how could they maditate on the Law and directly contradict it in their actions. And, in history, was it a really big deal to practice magic back in the early times. I ask this because it appears that there is a pattern in the Law in which the LORD commands us over and over not to do necromancing, devining, witchcraft, you know. It appears there is heavy emphasis on the banishment of this new age-like movement.
Judaism is unequivocally opposed to the nonsensical pseudoscience you politely call "esoteric sciences". Any book that claims that Abraham practiced magic is libeling the founder of all monotheistic ethical belief. A young man your age should not waste his time on such silliness and instead find some serious way of contributing to the world through righteous and constructive action. I'm certain that if you direct your efforts to serious studies and to good deeds you will succeed.