- General Questions
My son is getting married on a Sunday in Lakewood N.J. we live in Maryland. We were thinking to make things easier on guests and family to make the "Afruf" 2 weeks before the wedding. 1) Can we do that? 2) If we do make it earlier, since my son will be with us in Maryland on the Shaboss (that is one day before his Chassuna), is he required to get an Aliyah that Shaboss as well, besides the previous shaboss when we made the Afruf.
Shalom, Thank you for your question. First of all a big Mazal Tov! May you all merit to celebrate many happy smachot together. Your case is mentioned in the traditional sources, and is certainly allowed. In the work “Nesuim KeHilchatah” (hebrew) (chapter 6, 11-12) writes that when the Chatan is travelling to another city for the wedding, the custom is often to be called up to the Torah a week earlier in his home town, and have a kiddush and celebrate the Afruf then. This would apply to your situation also. So, in answer to your first question, you can certainly have the Afruf a week earlier in order to be able to have more people celebrate with you and solve travel difficulties. As to the Shabbat before the wedding whether the Chatan should get a second call up – this will depend on whether you are holding a second kiddush for him on that Shabbat. If you are having a second celebration for him, then he should get a second aliyah to the Torah. However, if you are only having one kiddush, on the first of the Shabbats before the wedding (which sounds like the more practical thing to do), then he is not given another call-up to the Torah. Of course all of this may vary with local custom, and I urge you to run this by the local Rabbis of both communities to make sure that the local practice is in line with what I wrote here. Again – Mazal Tov.