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Question
Why is it not the ashkenasi minhag for a chatan to say shehechianu under the chuppah on the occasion of his getting married. (A new Talit is often used as a workaround shehechianu)
Thx
Answer
Shalom,
Thank you for your question. The issue as to whether one should recite the Shehechianu bracha at a wedding has been discussed by many Rabbinic codifiers over the years. Some in fact rule that it should be recited (See Rabbi Yaakov Emden, Mor U’Ketziah 223). Others believe it should be said without using G-d’s name (Hida—Mahzik Berakha 223:5). However, the majority of opinions believe that it should not be recited. They give several reasons - A wedding does not have a fixed time and (according to some authorities), we do not recite a SheHeheyanu on an event that does not occur miZeman laZeman [that is the blessing includes the words “who has bought us to this time”, and is associated with events that occur at a fixed time in the calander]. Or, we do not recite a blessing on an act that is dependent on the will of others. Or, SheHeheyanu is not recited on a mitzvah that is long-lasting. Or, perhaps because the key mitzvah of a marriage is the mitzvah of peru u’Revu (be fruitful and multiply), which means that the mitzvah of marriage is not fully completed at a wedding ceremony.
Some communities “get around” the arguments by having the Chatan say the blessing over a new Tallit, and “include” the marriage in his blessing, as you wrote. But this is also not a universal practice.
I hope this is of some help. Here is a link to a very good scholarly article on this subject (https://www.jewishideas.org/article/sheheheyanu-blessing).
Blessings.
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