Through unfortunate circumstances, the grave reserved for my mom, next to my dad has been given to someone else. My mom's wish is to be buried by her husband, but this can't be done. I understand that cremation is becoming ok with some Jewish sectors. Is it acceptable to have my mom cremated and bury the urn by my dad to be able to give her what she wants? She cannot be asked in her state of mind (she is 94)?
ב"ה Shalom First of all, may your mother live and be well. Secondly, the idea of cremation is diametrically opposed to the Jewish way of dealing with the deceased and Jewish burial societies may decide not to inter the remains of a cremated body in a Jewish cemetery. The Torah commands us to bury the dead. The Torah even goes to great length to tell us how Abraham our forefather made great efforts to find a respectable place of burial for his wife Sarah. Cremation of the body is considered mutilation of the corpse according to Jewish law and is also considered an affront to the Jewish belief of the resurrection of the dead, which according to Maimonides is one of the 13 principles of the Jewish faith. Your respect for your mother in fulfilling her wishes of having her buried near your late father is praiseworthy. However, other ways should be sought to fulfill that wish to bring her after her demise to the proximity of your father's burial place. However, if that will be not be possible, the last and greatest respect to be given to your mother when the time has come for her depart from this world is to arrange for a Jewish burial. All the best