- Family and Society
- General Questions
Dating
Question
Hi. My question is about me and the guy I am seeing. I really like this boy I am seeing. He comes from a secular background and has become frum - I come from a frum background and have become more modern - so we sort of meet in the middle. My question is - how do I make it work with the families. This has proved really challenging for me - finding a way to introduce the guy I am seeing to my family. Are there any books I can read that might make the transition easier. I really want to get married and to this guy and I want to know that there is a future possible. Any advice would be great.
Answer
I would talk to your family first before introducing him. Explain to them your feelings for him and emphasize to them his religious commitment. Tell them that you intend to build a Jewish home together with him and ask them for their emotional support. I am certain that they are aware that you are now more modern - whatever that may mean - and perhaps they may view your marriage as a way of preventing you from becoming even more modern. Then introduce him and hope for the best.
Best wishes.
Rabbi Berel Wein

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Rabbi Berel Wein
The rabbi of the "HANASI" congregation in Yerushalim, head of the Destiny foundation, former head of the OU, Rosh Yeshiva of 'sharai Tora" and rabbi of the "Beit Tora" congregation, Monsey, New York.
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